In starting this blog, I was very concerned about perception. I want to make sure that I keep it positive and make sure that I don’t say anything I’ll have to apologize for later. I want to be “me”, but a presentable version! Any one can find this site – as I am the one and only Meredith Brace Sloss in the world, literally – so I have to keep in mind all audiences at all times: ex-boyfriends, past bosses, current friends, family, and (most frightening!) potential employers.

But sometimes I just want to bitch, especially while I’m on the hunt for a job because it is the worst.

 

There are so many fucking rules that are all completely relative, so I constantly feel like I’m doing something wrong. “You’re a fool if you don’t include a summary on your resume!” “Summaries are out. No need. Focus on your experience.”

Looking for a job is particularly difficult for me as I’m curious and soak up knowledge like a sponge. I’m over-educated. I’m both over and under experienced…while I’ve done so many different kinds of jobs, I haven’t stayed in one specific field. It’s because I want to know how to do everything – so I end up looking like a flake rather than a super versatile human.

However, I’m passionate! And I’m a quick learner, but in this economy…nobody wants to hire someone that they’re going to have to teach. I was recently having a discussion with a friend about this, and I believe that that hiring strategy is short-sighted on the employer’s part. Experience is gained and skills can be taught….but passion is innate. A person either has it, or they don’t. Maybe I’m thinking too “big picture”, but I’d rather hire an employee that was excited about the various resources they could bring to the table rather than an experienced, myopic pencil-pusher.

Applying online sucks. I’ve re-entered my information hundreds of times at this point. My computer is so confused by which password it should save for Brassring and Taleo, because those are the databases that every big corporation uses for their job submissions (and, by the way, they both appear to be stuck in 1998 (and suck hardcore)).

LinkedIn is my new favorite way to apply to jobs because with just a few clicks, my profile and a custom cover letter gets sent to potential employers. However, I’ve noticed a trend – only half of the jobs I apply for get looked at. And I’m applying for things that I’m totally and completely qualified for! I end up wasting time customizing a superb cover letter that never gets read. It’s so discouraging.

Also – and, this is fun – I just found a job on a career site that I think I applied to on another career site. I try to keep tabs on all of the positions I apply to, but that ends up taking as much time applying for jobs does. Now, I’m freaking out! Did I already apply to that job with another cover letter? Am I going to look completely irresponsible for not noticing? Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I apply to about 30 jobs per week. I’ve had 4 interviews since January. #ThumbsUpEmoji. What’s really fun about those interviews are that you’re supposed to pretend that that’s the ONLY JOB you’re interested in. That you dream about it at night. That you’ve already done all of the things that that job requires you to do so that they don’t have to train you. That you don’t want to move on from said job ever because they’re looking for longevity and someone they can trust. But, also…don’t look desperate or anything. Be cool. Be breezy.

If you’re reading this and you’re a potential employer or recruiter, here’s the deal: I’m a hard worker. I’ve got spunk. I’m fun to work with. I’ll make you laugh. I’m smart. I want to learn. I want to make a difference.

SOMEBODY HIRE ME, PLEASE.

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